So I was chatting with a friend of mine today. Banter was being thrown in all directions, and then it changed. It got more serious. My friend told me that I had changed in the time that we had known each other, and it was because of the gym. This comment wasn’t a positive one.
My friend said I’d become one of ‘those girls’. Those ‘gym girls’. I’d become the stereotype. The kind of girl we laugh at. That we’ve always laughed at. I walked away from this conversation deflated. It also made me question if I have in fact become ‘that girl’.
Do I walk into the gym and think I own the place? – yes. Do I chat to guys? – yes, but I workout in the free-weight and sometimes I need help with taking a weight off of a bar, or want to jump in on a piece of equipment, so does this count? Maybe… Do I wear fitted clothing? – yes, but I’m proud of how far I’ve come, and want to show it off. My trainer gets more compliments about this anyway, because he’s the one who’s been kicking my ass into shape. Do I think I know what I am doing and can basically train you? – yes, but so does everyone, I’m a cocky SOB, I admit it, and the only people who really know what to do are those educated in it, the trainers. Do I take selfie after selfie and post it on Instagram? – yes, I’m borderline narcissistic, and a millennial so sue me…
Alright, I’ve just defended every truth… I have become one of those girls… but I have also changed in a good way too. In the last two years my confidence has grown. Not just because I’ve lost weight. I’ve grown at work, and have learnt to believe in my ability to do things. I’m far more likely now to take a risk, to get up and go, to explore and try new things, because improving your self-confidence helps with stepping out of your comfort zone. I’m more open than I was before about how I feel and what I think – admittedly I lack a filter, but baby steps guys – and its made me a better person to be around, because I’m not bottling how up how I feel. That makes a massive difference to not only my mental health but also my ability to interact with others and be around others too.
Change isn’t a bad thing, and this is what I wanted to highlight in this post. While my friend has only seen the negative in how I’ve changed in the time we have known each other, there are positives to me changing. In order to grow, we have to change, and learn what’s good, or bad. We just need to realise that change can be for good too.