Getting sex is easy. Finding Love is hard. But to know someone’s true meaning behind their words, is the most difficult thing of all.  

2016 has been an eventful year, for everyone I think, including myself. When it comes to boys, do I have a few stories to tell! One that I’d really like to share with you today goes a little something like this. 

There is a boy I’ve known for a long time. A very long time. We’ve spent years being friends, and being involved in one another’s lives. At a family event over a year ago, us both being drunk and all, he mentioned he loved me, and that it was more, that he was in love with me, and he made a move. The next day, we both brushed it off and went about our lives. Although things were said to me whenever we would meet up. A month or so ago, he and I met up again. With a little alcohol flowing, a similar conversation and outcome to the night of the family event occurred again. 

Naturally, as it’s me, I wanted to call him out on it. So a few days later, I messaged him and asked that if he indeed said he loved me, why would he not just ask me out. As it turned out, my honesty was not so well received. He denied ever feeling the way he said, and that how he behaved was put down entirely to drink. So I put two and two together and figured out that he basically just wanted to get laid, and I was the closest thing to him at those points in time. 

We met up a few days ago, about three weeks or so after the text argument had occurred. It was normal, just as it always is with him. He ensures that it is always this way when we are together. He has away of making things ‘normal’ and easy. After a catch up on how each other was doing, he brought up the ‘incident’. 

This whole thing made me laugh, cringe and also think, seriously, you can’t make this shit up. We spoke and one of his friendship groups are and I quote, ‘a little incestuous’. As in the guys have got with all of the girls in the friendship group, and while he’s not used the words ‘I love you before’, it’s something that he agrees that he needed to be called out on. So without coming out and saying it directly, my friend wanted a smash and dash. He wanted to sleep with me. The sad thing about it all, is that he knows me, and is aware that I’m the last person that that would possibly work with. 

So, why do men feel the need to say anything to get a girl into bed with them? Why do we no longer have any consideration for how another person feels? Or would feel after they discovered how you treated them? Why do we only ever focus on lust? Admittedly the story above kind of makes my friend sound like a complete dick. He’s not. He’s a good person, I’ve known him for years. However, his behavior when he is drunk is childish and ‘dick-ish’. Actually most of the stories I get from the guys my age are similar. It’s terrible to treat a girl like this, in fact anyone for that matter. Does this change with age? I firmly believe that there are men that are good out there. I have some pretty spectacular examples of good men around me. Although I sort of feel that I am currently attracting all the boys who behave like ass-holes. 

While this makes for great blog material, I worry that our generation is slowly losing respect for one another. That we believe that everything nowadays should only be about sex, or that sex should come first and then knowing a person, second. I hope that this is just my age group and that we grow out of it, unfortunately however, I just don’t quite believe it is…

Posted by Selina

I’m Selina, I live on the outskirts of London with my parents, sister and my rather adorably insane golden Labrador, Bailey. I am often found rambling onto others (mainly friends and family) about my love of food, fashion, books, films, the gym and more. Not to mention the million and one opinions that are forever busying themselves in my brain. Most of what I have to say is based on experience, or at times a lack of. Not forgetting of course my rather fantastic failures… (falling downstairs after a speech in front of my entire division at school anyone?!). All of this has created a desire for discovery and a penchant to put pen to paper, or in this case, fingers to keyboard and tell the world. So please feel free to join me on this rather odd and exciting adventure called life. I do hope you like, love and laugh out loud at what you read.

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